Issue 3, Volume 18 De Minimis would like to thank Rory Dempsey, Lizz Kuiper and our mysterious anonymous contributor for sending in competition poems, and we are pleased to congratulate Lizz Kuiper on winning our first competition of the semester! Please see below for a full catalogue of entries! An Ode to 185 Pelham LIZZ KUIPER It’s been five months since we were last on campus, and lockdown has left me nostalgic for the little things… What I wouldn’t give to be huddled up in a lecture theatre today A rainbow of Frank Green keep cups (remember those?) lining the front row A too-loud whisper cutting through an explanation of Hearsay – ‘Do you have a charger for a MacBook Pro?’ I’m feeling nostalgic for those hot summer days, hotter still for those twirling sausages on the lawn of University Square as they wield cheap white bread like sceptres, shining beacons of free food for throngs of stressed students escaping the stifling JD Silent Section Who’d have thought I’d start to miss the law school – a building with all the personality of a Carr’s water cracker, and yet … I’d risk the anxious clerkship chatter, or hearing a stressy Susan dissect an answer to an exam question that I Did Not Get Just to be back with my pals on Pelham I even miss the too-eager-beavers, whose hands fly into the air like fireworks before the lecturer has finished asking their question So starved of social interaction, I am now the obnoxious law kid in the room You either die a hero, or you live long enough to see yourself become the villain I say, as I unmute myself on Zoom Yes, I’m aware I sound like a sycophant I’m just feeling my feelings – definitely not a secret LSS plant So please don’t take to the comments to have an anonymous rant About how I’m wrong, because today … I just can’t I’d probably sell a kidney to destroy my liver at law ball Or perhaps I’d sell my custom MLS corps textbook – that may be worth more I’d kill to be studying in the building again, on my most favourite floor (Mezzanine) Oh, how I wish I could be walking through those iconic revolving doors I still wouldn’t go to Porta Via though.
A Mysterious Malkin Blessing
ANONYMOUS On the eve before my first exam Whoever did I see A lonely Ian Malkin at the Coles on Barkly Six weeks of uni was all we'd had Could I still recognise the fellow? Was this Pre exam delirium Or should I go and say hello With that distinctive moustache and cargo shorts adorned This man was surely Ian My first year self fawned My own good luck charm a message from the gods The exams won’t be that hard if Malkin shops at Coles! But worse, would it not be him I live in Brunswick after all Odd fashion and strange hair are not that strange at all A friendly lass or so I’m told But this day was an exception I feared to check And break the spell Of a mysterious Malkin blessing
An excited Brunswegian
18/8/2020 07:55:08 pm
Can't believe Malkin and I get our toilet paper and tofu at the same Coles!
Ronald
21/8/2020 11:25:24 am
Quality submissions !! Thanks for brightening my day. Comments are closed.
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