Equity Uncle

Dear Equity Uncle...

After a few too many glasses of champagne and perhaps too long staring at the fire-twirlers' twirls, I made a mistake. I mean, he's relatively good-looking and talks a lot in class so he must be smart, but I didn't plan it and now I don't want it and everyone will know, won't they? What can I do? Is there a tort of seduction in Equity? Help me Obi-Equity Uncle, you're my only hope.

In Distress


Dear Ms Distress

Equity Uncle has dealt with this kind of thing before. Equity began in the Courts of Chancery, and the Courts of Chancery were very clear that if you hooked up with the sort of person who seeks unjust enrichment or dips his hand in the trust's honey pot or talks incessantly in class, Equity would not help you. Perhaps that is what justice demands - the post-coital and post-fire-twirled shame of being seen with a guy like that.

Equity foresees that justice has already been served in this case. Equity can see beyond the mere physical world, because Equity is a Jedi. Did you know they're making a new Star Wars movie? The Courts of Chancery haven't been this abuzz with excitement since we executed Jar Jar.

Kindest Regards

Equity Windu