De Minimis
  • Home
  • ABOUT US
  • Podcast
  • Your Learned Friend
  • Anonymous Feedback
  • Art
  • Get published!
  • Constitution
  • Archive
    • 2018
    • 2017
    • 2017 >
      • Semester 2 (Volume 12) >
        • Issue 1
        • Issue 2
        • Issue 3
        • Issue 4
        • Issue 5
        • Issue 6
        • Issue 7
        • Issue 8 (election issue)
        • Issue 9
        • Issue 10
        • Issue 11
        • Issue 12
    • 2016 >
      • Semester 1 (Volume 9) >
        • Issue 1
        • Issue 2
        • Issue 3
        • Issue 4
        • Issue 5
        • Issue 6
        • Issue 7
        • Issue 8
        • Issue 9
        • Issue 10
        • Issue 11
        • Issue 12
      • Semester 2 (Volume 10) >
        • Issue 1
        • Issue 2
        • Issue 3
        • Issue 4
        • Issue 5
        • Issue 6
        • Issue 7
        • Issue 8 (Election Issue)
        • Issue 9
        • Issue 10
        • Issue 11
        • Issue 12
        • Issue 13 (test)
    • 2015 >
      • Semester 1 (Volume 7) >
        • Issue 1
        • Issue 2
        • Issue 3
        • Issue 4
        • Issue 5
        • Issue 6
        • Issue 7
        • Issue 8
        • Issue 9
        • Issue 10
        • Issue 11
      • Semester 2 (Volume 8) >
        • Issue 1
        • Issue 2
        • Issue 3
        • Issue 4
        • Issue 5
        • Issue 6
        • Issue 7
        • Issue 8
        • Issue 9
        • Issue 10
    • 2014 >
      • Semester 1 (Volume 5) >
        • Issue 1
        • Issue 2
        • Issue 3
        • Issue 4
        • Issue 5
        • Issue 6
        • Issue 7
      • Semester 2 (Volume 6) >
        • Issue 1
        • Issue 2
        • Issue 3
        • Issue 4
        • Issue 6
        • Issue 7
        • Issue 10
        • Issue 12
    • 2013 >
      • Issue 1
      • Issue 2
      • Issue 3
      • Issue 4
      • Issue 5
      • Issue 6
    • 2012 >
      • Semester 1 (Volume 1) >
        • Issue 1
        • Issue 2
        • Issue 3
        • Issue 4
        • Issue 5
        • Issue 6
        • Issue 7
        • Issue 8
        • Issue 9
        • Issue 10
        • Issue 11
        • Issue 12
      • Semester 2 (Volume 2) >
        • Issue 1
        • Issue 2
        • Issue 3
        • Issue 4
        • Issue 5
        • Issue 6
        • Issue 7
        • Issue 8
        • Issue 9
        • Issue 10
        • Issue 11
        • Issue 12

A MUTE’S SPEECH

1/5/2018

 
Semester 1 Issue 9

By Sonya Santa Maria

A closed mouth does not necessarily mean an empty soul. Silence does not necessarily mean stupidity. Indeed, stupidity is often inferred; but a quiet man may very well be a less burdened one.


There have been occasions where my silence has been misjudged as stupidity in the classroom, or mistaken by my friends and family as incompetence in communication; and whilst the underlying reason for my selective mutism is a fear many might dismiss as absurd and irrational, I fear that I am not alone in my silent predicament. ​

Picture
An eloquent silence by Lawrence Alma-Tadema
Believe it or not, silence can be solace.

If your mind is puzzled by that proposition, then this piece of writing may have achieved its aim of stimulating thought and appreciation for silence. Ponder its benefits and detriments, consider those around you who often remain silent, and more crucially, think deeply about why they choose to stay silent. Search beyond reasons such as their lack of effort, or understanding of a subject. Beyond indolence,until you reach fear. But still, probe deeper. The fear of being humiliated is one thing, but the fear of not knowing who you are anymore presents a different meaning of dangerous altogether.

It is one of the heaviest things to carry on your shoulders: people’s expectations. No one understands this more than an overachiever. When you have been the high achiever, ambitious, all-rounder, and golden child for a long time, you may find yourself leaning towards silence for comfort. Especially when you have people continuously reminding you that they are counting on you, and placing all their hopes in you.

The greater the expectations, the more stonelike one can become. We strive for nothing but perfection and glory because that is who we are according to these people, and years of having this self-perception ingrained in us means that nothing but greatness will be enough. To be anything else is to be someone else, and that is enough to evoke emotion within derail an overachiever.

It is not that we choose to be indifferent. Selective mutism and lack of expression capacity to articulate ourselves prevent us from showing weakness. Even if we choose to share our achievements with others, there is always a worry that it may only amplify others’ expectations of us and reinforce the lack of space for failure; the lack of space to be human.

Overachievers are not meant to underachieve. Scholarship recipients are not supposed to fail. Law students are supposed to be vocal and opinionated. Law students - especially Melbourne law students - must be the crème de la crème of the next generation of lawyers.

Yet, we  my fellow ‘mute’ peers and myself often seem to be misjudged as emotionless beings. From my own personal experience, particularly in non-law school situations, my choice to be silent at times is often misread as arrogance and being anti-social. But when you have so much to do, yet so little time in your pursuit of perfection and conformity with people’s stratospheric expectations, there is no room for distraction and drama.

So, perhaps our silence is not arrogance. Maybe our silence is so that we do not allow for an opportunity to fail in another’s eyes, and in turn so that we can protect ourselves. Perfectionism can sometimes be the devil’s lure - in our pursuit for it, we divert so much energy that we often become robotic and void of emotions. But perhaps it is the very evidence that we feel emotions - it just happens to be an irrational fear of failing and disappointing you.  
Anon
1/5/2018 10:06:33 pm

This is one of the most thoughtful, honest and beautiful pieces I have read in a long time.

Thank you for sharing your mind to the world!

Nathan
1/5/2018 10:39:42 pm

This resonates with me on so many levels. Thanks for sharing the thoughts that many people seem to misunderstand about those of us who sometimes choose to evade the noise and keep to ourselves. I couldn't have articulated this better myself, and I needed to read something like this at this point in the semester and degree.


Comments are closed.
    Picture

    Archives

    December 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    October 2020
    September 2020
    August 2020
    July 2020
    June 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    October 2019
    September 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    December 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    August 2015
    May 2015
    April 2015
    March 2015
    October 2014
    September 2014
    August 2014
    July 2014
    May 2014
    April 2014

  • Home
  • ABOUT US
  • Podcast
  • Your Learned Friend
  • Anonymous Feedback
  • Art
  • Get published!
  • Constitution
  • Archive
    • 2018
    • 2017
    • 2017 >
      • Semester 2 (Volume 12) >
        • Issue 1
        • Issue 2
        • Issue 3
        • Issue 4
        • Issue 5
        • Issue 6
        • Issue 7
        • Issue 8 (election issue)
        • Issue 9
        • Issue 10
        • Issue 11
        • Issue 12
    • 2016 >
      • Semester 1 (Volume 9) >
        • Issue 1
        • Issue 2
        • Issue 3
        • Issue 4
        • Issue 5
        • Issue 6
        • Issue 7
        • Issue 8
        • Issue 9
        • Issue 10
        • Issue 11
        • Issue 12
      • Semester 2 (Volume 10) >
        • Issue 1
        • Issue 2
        • Issue 3
        • Issue 4
        • Issue 5
        • Issue 6
        • Issue 7
        • Issue 8 (Election Issue)
        • Issue 9
        • Issue 10
        • Issue 11
        • Issue 12
        • Issue 13 (test)
    • 2015 >
      • Semester 1 (Volume 7) >
        • Issue 1
        • Issue 2
        • Issue 3
        • Issue 4
        • Issue 5
        • Issue 6
        • Issue 7
        • Issue 8
        • Issue 9
        • Issue 10
        • Issue 11
      • Semester 2 (Volume 8) >
        • Issue 1
        • Issue 2
        • Issue 3
        • Issue 4
        • Issue 5
        • Issue 6
        • Issue 7
        • Issue 8
        • Issue 9
        • Issue 10
    • 2014 >
      • Semester 1 (Volume 5) >
        • Issue 1
        • Issue 2
        • Issue 3
        • Issue 4
        • Issue 5
        • Issue 6
        • Issue 7
      • Semester 2 (Volume 6) >
        • Issue 1
        • Issue 2
        • Issue 3
        • Issue 4
        • Issue 6
        • Issue 7
        • Issue 10
        • Issue 12
    • 2013 >
      • Issue 1
      • Issue 2
      • Issue 3
      • Issue 4
      • Issue 5
      • Issue 6
    • 2012 >
      • Semester 1 (Volume 1) >
        • Issue 1
        • Issue 2
        • Issue 3
        • Issue 4
        • Issue 5
        • Issue 6
        • Issue 7
        • Issue 8
        • Issue 9
        • Issue 10
        • Issue 11
        • Issue 12
      • Semester 2 (Volume 2) >
        • Issue 1
        • Issue 2
        • Issue 3
        • Issue 4
        • Issue 5
        • Issue 6
        • Issue 7
        • Issue 8
        • Issue 9
        • Issue 10
        • Issue 11
        • Issue 12