The Intellectual Bluff

Jessica Sykes
Volume 3, Issue 11, (Originally Published on Monday 20 May 2013)
 
If it weren’t for the need to appear constantly intelligent at law school I would know far more than I actually do.
 
My friend, who shall remain unnamed, recently confided he thought the saying was ‘for all intensive purposes’, and thankfully is no longer a douchebag given he confided in someone who corrected him, derided him and is now putting it in a newspaper. This, in turn, gave rise to a friend admitting he didn’t know what lascivious meant. Gavels down, we all have our weaknesses.
 
Strangely, this has devolved to us analysing each other’s sentences to the point that there are just verbs, nouns and adjectives foetally hugging vulnerably in the corner. Whilst this sounds rough, it is actually for the betterment of our minds, or at least sentence structure.
 
It’s taught the valuable lesson that even if you’re worried about looking stupid, it’s worthwhile asking the question. At worst, you’ll wind up some kind of linguistic supergroup, armed with worryingly low self-esteem.
 
God help anyone trying to make friends with us – bring your thesaurus.
 
We’ll need it.
 
Jessica Sykes